"You're doing great!"
In the mix of nurses telling her WHAT to do, you telling her that whatever the heck she's doing is just stupendous will cheer her up and relieve some pressure.
"What do you need/want right now?"
If you see her fretting, she may not be able to get a word in and may be afraid to say what she's thinking because of all the medical personnel around. You be her advocate and ask her to vocalize her needs/wants. (i.e. to turn to another position or have water)
"Breathe like this..."
Yes, she will forget how to breathe. If you watched the videos or went to the class and know what breath she should do for that point in labor, remind her.
If you guys didn't do all that just take deep breaths and remind her how. ask the midwife or nurse to guide her breathing. This is good if you notice her starting to panic.
"You're so beautiful babe."
Just say it and watch her light up. If she turns into a hellion you did something wrong hours ago.
"It'll be ok, just focus."
Birth can have complications and you don't know if it will be ok, but health wise, she needs to to think it will be so she stays calm.
Do you know what she should focus on? No, but she does. It's a sidebar in the back of her mind, but her worry is winning so you reminding her will help her focus on what she needs to, like breathing or pushing.
"You can do this."
If your girl is going all natural, no epidural, this statement cannot be overused!
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When so many other people in the room are talking it can become overwhelming. Sometimes it's best to not say anything and just be there beside her.
"Just a little more/longer."
One contraction can feel endless, especially when they get stronger and stronger. Having a little reminder that it won't last forever gives her the encouragement to endure a little longer.
"You're going to see baby soon!"
Taking her mind off of the difficulties of labor and on the positive end result will no doubt help! When she feels positive and encouraged her mind stays calm and she will have an all around better and easier labor.
"Remember you're strong."
At moments of worry, fear or pain this is helpful to hear.
"I'm so proud of you."
Timing is everything. Some things are good to encourage during a contraction. Others, like this one, are more easily received during the calmer moments.
"I love you."
This verbal emotional connection will help her leave labor land and be close to you mentally and emotionally for just a moment.
"Stay in control/control your breathing."
Labor is not just physically challenging, the majority is mental. You'll notice if she needs to be reminded right away to remain in control and not panic.
"Keep going!"
General statements like this are great, you can't go wrong. You're encouraging her without telling her exactly what to do. She knows what to do, she just needs encouragement.
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